home sweet home

Well, hello there.

Thanks so much for all of your comments, thoughtful messages, and warm thoughts. John and I have once again been overwhelmed by all of the kindness and support that surround us on this journey. Each day, John has read me comments and email messages, and they have done so much to keep my spirits strong over this difficult past week and a half.

Last Wednesday ended up being a very scary day, although it started out as nothing out of the ordinary. I piddled around the house in the morning, and just after lunch time, John and I met with our pediatrician. I had done a little bit of shopping in the afternoon, trying to find some essentials so I could pack my hospital bag. I kept telling myself that I needed to go ahead and pack, just in case something happened, but I had been unable to find any underwear that I thought would not irritate my incision. Luckily, I was finally able to find some, as well as some new slippers. I met John at home, we ate dinner, and then headed off to our infant CPR class. After class, I was feeling some pressure and crampiness. Some days, it's hard to tell whether I'm actually cramping or if I just need to go to the bathroom. So, upon arriving home, I headed straight to the bathroom. As soon as I sat down, I felt a huge gush and looked down to a toilet full of bright red blood. I scrambled to find a pad and started walking through the house calling for John.

We immediately called the doctor on call and left a message through the answering service. The bleeding was heavy, so we decided to head directly to the emergency room before waiting for the doctor to call back. They got us into labor and delivery pretty quickly. I stripped down and put on a gown and bled all over the floor before I got onto the bed. In the next few minutes, they the fetal and contraction monitors strapped to my belly and an IV in my hand. My mom and stepfather, John's mom, and our friend Nancy were all close by. The doctor monitored the bleeding, which thankfully stopped within an hour or so. At one point, the anesthesiologist came in to talk about how things would proceed should I have to deliver that night. I got a shot in the rear - steroids to help the baby's lungs develop. John settled into the pullout couch for the night while I was monitored. I had contractions throughout the night, but they never seemed to progress, and thankfully, they didn't cause any additional bleeding. I think I finally fell asleep around 4:30 am.

I spent the next day on the monitors until we were released to be moved upstairs to the antepartum unit. Before making my exit, our lovely nurse Karen gave me a bed bath to clean me up.  I was so thankful for that little bit of refreshment that I didn't really care that I was sprawled out naked on a hospital bed with a stranger scrubbing me down. Any modesty I had left is gone after 4 days of using a bedpan. Those nurses are angels.

Really, I can't say enough good things about the care we received during our stay. The nurses were completely amazing - so upbeat and gentle and caring. I felt extremely well taken care of. During our stay, I met with a hospitalist (who was checking out my crazy heart palpitations), the neonatologist, two anesthesiologists, and the lactation consultant. All of them were great.

Honestly, the worst part of being there (besides the bedpan) was having that darn IV in my hand pretty much the whole time. It was really painful, and got more and more sore each day. It was difficult to not be able to type or write, or really even scroll easily on my laptop. The days went by pretty quickly, probably because there was someone coming to check on me or the baby nearly every hour. I came home from the hospital exhausted.

So, now I'm settled in at home for two weeks of strict bedrest. I can get up to use the bathroom and to briefly shower every other day. I spent nearly all day yesterday sleeping. I'm going to try to post frequently in the next couple of weeks, as I've been processing a lot of things that seem important to write about. But for now, I'm exhausted again, and I'm off to get my rest. I hear I better get it while I can.

Comments

[Filtering Life]

Wow, that is so so scary. I am so glad that you are hanging in there allowing more time for your baby to get bigger and stronger. Looking forward to hearing more about what you are learning.

[Kath]

Dear Nikole, it's so good to hear from you. Welcome home! After you've been through so much, I hope the next two weeks pass very restfully and uneventfully for you. I'll be thinking of you and looking forward to updates if you can manage them.

[Harmony]

i am so glad to hear you are doing better and that you are home resting!

i look forward to hearing more and your thoughts and updates! take it easy!

[Harmony]

i am so glad to hear you are doing better and that you are home resting!

i look forward to hearing more and your thoughts and updates! take it easy!

[christina(apronstrings)]

how scary! omg, that must have been awful. i hope you get some much needed rest.

[Adrien]

Hey! So good to hear from you and I'm so sorry you've had such a stressful, scary week. Now, you sleep like it's your job and please let me know if you need anything - books, DVDs, bon bons? I'm your girl.

Hang in there!

Adrien

[John]

Adrien - Send bon bons. Stat.

[SaraS-P]

get the rest while you can!

[joriel]

Welcome home! I'm so relieved that things seem to be stabilized and Bumble is hanging in there. And I'm really excited to hear more about what you're thinking and feeling. Keep up the great work at taking good care of yourself. Much much love and great big hugs!!

[Andi]

Wow...scary!!! But so glad to know you're okay!!! Just a few more weeks Bumble...hang in there!