Get ready for a whiny post ahead.
For me, Mondays are never fun. So, the first Monday of being back at work for an entire day after nearly two weeks of being out on medical leave was, well...I'm sure you can imagine. Torture was the first word that came to mind, but that seems entirely inappropriate considering the state of our world these days. So, I'll settle for saying that my day sucked (yes, my language skills are flourishing). I did have a zillion things to keep me busy, so I wasn't left to sit at my desk, staring at the wall, thinking about how crappy the world is, and how crappy my world has been for the past two weeks...really for nearly the past year. But what I had to do were things that I absolutely hate, like preparing for a meeting that I'm absolutely dreading, revising the highly edited 30 pages of funding guidelines for the grant program I coordinate, and...gasp...returning a dozen or so phone calls. Really, it's the phone calls that get me. These days, I prefer to communicate via email, at least for business purposes. It's just easier that way. In emails, I don't have to try to disguise the sorrow in my voice or choke back my tears when the person on the other end of the line asks why I don't sound like myself. It's because I just had my fourth miscarriage, silly. It's because I actually let myself believe that this time it might work. It's because, for the past two weeks, I've been crying and bleeding and cramping and wondering what shape my insides were twisting themselves into (yes, my grammar skills are improving too). So, top off that first day back with a minor auto mishap on the way home, and you have an emotional miscarrying woman in tears by the time she reached her driveway.
So, there you have it. Don't say I didn't warn you.